“Lord, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done wonderful things, things planned long ago.”  (Isaiah 25:1 NIV)

Six summers ago while I was living in London, I felt God prompting me to write a book about my testimony. I decided to follow this calling and began to write. But soon, doubts started to set in. Would anyone want to read my story? I was a new Christian after all, and I had some unanswered prayers that I was still struggling with. I wondered how my “imperfect” life could possibly encourage someone who shared the same struggles. 

I resonated with Moses when he tried to decline and bargain with God. “Moses said to the Lord, ‘Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.’ The Lord said to him, ‘Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.’”(Exodus 4:10-12 NIV)

Fate was sealed when I met an older lady on the subway one day as I was heading home from a church conference.  After finding out that both of us had just come out of the same church conference, I enthusiastically shared with her about my testimony “writing project”. The lady gave me a skeptical look and asked, “Why? Why do you want to spend time to write a testimony?” She confirmed my doubts so I decided to put away my laptop and forget about this project that was once so vividly clear in my heart.

But God gave me another chance.

Earlier this year Youning, the founder of No Other Name Jewelry, asked if I would like to share about my faith journey on their website. I love how NON not only creates Christian-themed jewelry but also provides an avenue for believers to encourage others by sharing about the footprint of God in their daily lives. After realizing how this opportunity could serve as an E-ministry to others, I gladly agreed to finally share my testimony. I didn’t know where to begin but I decided to tell my story starting from the struggles in my dating life that I experienced throughout my 20s. Nonetheless, deep down I still wondered if anyone besides my own friends would really care to read my testimony.

Sometime this past week, I received a phone call from someone who had been following my professional Instagram account. During our conversation, she told me how my testimony and other short stories that I had written for NON had helped her therapeutically. I was and still am encouraged from this unexpected feedback. While reminiscing on the conversation, I am reminded of how we tend to doubt our worthiness even though it is God who created and gave us our very worth.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my motherʼs womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” (Psalms 139:13-16 NIV)

My testimony is part of God’s greater story, and I hope that we as Christians will never shy away from sharing our stories. As long as we live, our story is in progress, and though we may not have all the answers to our struggles, we will have gained insights and perspective in the midst of them. When in doubt, remember that ultimately God is our story writer and not only are our stories each unique, but they also make an impact even when we don’t know or believe it. 

“For we are Godʼs handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” (Ephesians 2:10 NIV)

- Susan C.
Social worker striving to follow God’s call to serve, listen, encourage and love others well
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